People need some outlet to let their feelings out to reduce stress, grief, anger, and sometimes frustration. I feel lonely, useless, outcast today. Why? I guess it is because of age, physical weakness, not being connected with society. I am confined to my house, voluntarily and somewhat involuntarily. I need to make food at least three days a week, which is good for my health, but in some respect, which is bad because that is the thing preventing me from going out. If I want to break away from this routine, I would have to give up on my money given by him. Making food is what the least thing I need to do. Of course the whole money I receive is not spent wholly for me. The money covers cost of food, car insurance, house subscription savings, actual cost insurance, allowance, tuition, maintenance cost, transportation, and etc. All cost deducted, the remains will be saved for my senior years. I don't know how long that will be. But I know for sure that I will be alone. I didn't know that my later life would be like that. I should have known that. But I am okay. Everyone will be alone in the end. In my case the time comes earlier than others. So I need to prepare for that period.